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What Did Customers Steal From Bars and Restaurants This Holiday Season?

A large dog statue, for one

Missing: a painting from Larrys
Lawrence

Customers: can’t live without ‘em, can’t trust them not to steal any décor from your restaurant or bar unless it’s bolted to the wall. As sporadic past installments of Eater’s Shit People Steal have revealed, small, easily-smuggled objects going missing at the hands of customers is almost a given — hot sauce bottles, business card holders, miscellaneous tchotchkes.

Less common, and more aggravating to owners and staff, is when larger and more valuable items mysteriously vanish. Thanks to customers emboldened by either drunkenness or pure asshole-ishness, there are two cases of that happening over the so called most wonderful time of the year.

First up, Larrys, where a painting from partner Annika Krausz’s grandfather was thieved off the bathroom wall right before New Year’s. Depressingly, one Gatineau restaurateur notes in the comments that she has had to glue art to the wall to avoid such a problem.

A little further north on the Main, and dive bar Taverne Cobra reported that a large plastic dog sculpture named Miller (after the mass-produced American beer; possibly a more original beer-based name than “Bud”) was snatched by a customer on her way out, with CCTV footage to show it.

Bien triste nouvelle en ce réveillon du jour de l’an. Une cliente s’est emparé de Miller, notre précieux chien de garde-bibelot situé tout près de la sortie. On se réjouit par contre qu’elle détient l’intelligence d’un caillou puisqu’en plus de payer sa note à l’aide de sa carte personnelle (Ah! Ah! on sait comment tu t’appelles), cette criminelle a osé commettre son délit devant pas UNE mais bien DEUX caméras de sécurité (de qualité supérieure, nous tenons à le préciser). Donc ce message s’adresse à toi, Ô dognappeuse à l’avant bras droit tatoué. T’as jusqu’à ce lundi 20h00 pour nous réconcilier avec notre précieux chien sans quoi nous nous verrons dans l’obligation de remettre ton nom aux autorités supérieures. On te donne un p’tit break parce que c’est les fêtes et que tu vas probablement te réveiller très tard (et seule) dans ton lit demain matin. C’est ça la magie de Noël! PS: N'aies craintes, on n'est pas violent. On va juste te pointer du doigt en riant.

Posted by Taverne Cobra on Saturday, December 31, 2016

But, hold your sympathy — it turns out that it may have just been a publicity stunt, at least going off a mock hostage video featuring the dog statue posted Monday.

BONNES NOUVELLES! Nous sommes présentement en négociations avec les ravisseurs de notre chien Miller et ils promettent de le rapporter aujourd'hui avant 20h00. Voici un vidéo qu'ils nous ont récemment transmis afin d'entrer en contact. A+ pour l'approche humoristique. Not making this up.

Posted by Taverne Cobra on Monday, January 2, 2017

It’s eminently possible that the dog was stolen by a friend of the bar who thought it would be a fun joke, but it seems a little staged. But with 40,000 views, Cobra certainly won the attention-grabbing stakes.

Owners, managers, servers, bartenders — if you’ve had snot-nosed customers pinching your establishment’s belongings, don’t hesitate to send Eater a tip or get in touch via email to tell us about it or engage in some public shaming.

larrys

5201 Boulevard Saint-Laurent, Le Plateau-Mont-Royal, QC H2T 1S4 (514) 503-1070 Visit Website

Taverne Cobra

6584 St-Laurent, Montreal, QC H2S 3C6 (514) 903-2330 Visit Website

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